The Grandfather Paradox
I was picked for this mission
Because I was in my prime
My conception of what lies around me
And my perception of time
I was but a young scientist
Still learning my own craft
Then a letter came in the mail
That would change my future, present, and past
It was dubbed top secret
For my eyes only to read
The return address was the pentagon
I was someone they would need
The letter had a number
To confirm it was not a joke
And when I dialed the number in
The voice of a woman spoke
We set up a meeting
For that very next day
They flew me in by private jet
And then had me whisked away
A black SUV was waiting
The men who drove did not speak
And when we pulled up to the pentagon
The mood suddenly turned bleak
As I was walked inside
They took me past security check
And as we entered an elevator
My escort had his retina checked
Security clearance was given
And we begun to lower down
To a place kept shy of the public
And hidden deep under ground
As it came to a stop
We were met by a door
And as we entered the room
I was introduced to four
Four men in army uniforms
Those who now controlled my fate
As they sat me down in an armchair
And did not hesitate
I was first made to sign papers
Agreements to keep my mouth shut
Because the words I would soon hear
Would make history book's cut's
They were doing experiments
Based on Einstein's theories of time
And they had built a machine
Hidden by large hadron's design
At C.E.R.N. they built a collider
They said to simulate the big bang
But this machine served a dual purpose
One for which times bells rang
With this machine time travel was possible
But they needed someone young and fit
And someone who knew what they were doing
The science, as well as all of the risks
That's where I came in
At the age of twenty-eight
I was a theoretical physicist
Things like this made my heart race
They would send me in the machine
To the time when my grandparents thrived
Long before I was even a fetus
Let alone in my prime
I was to just go back
I was not to interfere
These were the rules I was given
If I was to persevere
They needed to see if it worked
If it did I would then live scotch free
I would receive government checks
Life would fly by for me
So this I agreed to
And they gave me an iPod
It would allow me to return
Once I had done my job
I was allowed three hours
To dwell inside of the past
I was to visit my grandfather
On his old run down ranch
That's when they took me to C.E.R.N.
And strapped me into the machine
There was but a single chair
And inside of it they strapped me
They told me it would be painful
But that the sensation would pass
Then they turned on the machine
And lights all around me flashed
And then it all hit me
Like my heart being ripped from my chest
The pain was nearly unbearable
It felt like broken bones at best
But then it all stopped
As I collapsed onto the ground
The chair had disappeared
As well as the room and those around
When I got to my feet
I stood outside of a ranch
It was one I recognized
With only a single glance
As I hid in the brush
I stared in at people I loved
Before I ever knew them
Just after they fell in love
They were my grandparents
And it nearly brought me to tears
That's when the realization came
That I turned the clock back by years
What the hell had I done
Did I just travel through time
How the fuck did I get here
Did I just prove Albert Einstein
I searched in my pocket for the iPod
Just to make sure it was still there
And sure enough there it was
As I again fixed my stare
But then something went wrong
I don't know what I pressed
The iPod blasted it's music
The sound I tried to suppress
In the house all came to a halt
As my grandfather shouted "who's there"
Then he grabbed for his rifle
And gave his signature glare
I tried my best not to move
But a twig snapped underneath me
Then BANG came the blast
My grandfather's round hit at my feet
I tried to run for it
That's when he fired once more
The shot scattered across my leg
As I fell down to the floor
My grandfather caught up
He grabbed me by my shirt
He screamed to know who I was
Shaking me in the dirt
I begged and pleaded
Even saying I was his grandson
He laughed saying it was impossible
With not even an expectant son
I begged even more
But he refused to believe
And he kicked me on the ground
As my leg continued bleeding
And then he pointed his gun
Straight at me on the floor
What I did next would seal my fate
And make me question evermore
I knocked it from his hands
In a moment of desperation
We then fought with our fists
I had no thoughts of reservation
I was fighting for my life
Then I got the upper hand
As he fell to the floor
I drew my line in the sand
I grabbed for his weapon
And before he could get to his feet
I fired square at his chest
Until his heart no longer beat
That's when I heard the scream
As I saw my grandmother at the doorstep
The look of terror in her eyes
As saw me with the gun and wept
In the distance I heard sirens
And I knew I had to be gone
I pulled out the iPod once more
One swipe would take me back along
As I pressed the screen
Suddenly the pain returned
I twitched in my place
As my insides turned
But when I came to
I did not sit in the chair
There was no-one around me
At me not a single soul stared
I was alone back C.E.R.N.
I did not understand
Where had everyone gone
I had followed their plans
That's when the door busted down
And soldiers came in from all around
Their guns all pointed towards me
As I st there on the ground
After then came a scientist
One of the men I had earlier seen
He ordered the men to put their guns down
I thought he would be my relief
I thanked him so much
Now that I was in my own time
But he knew not who I was
He told me being there was a crime
I replied it could not be
He himself was among those who knew
About the mission provided to me
The specs, iPod, and time that I traveled through
He then turned his head
Told the soldiers to take me away
I was put into a cell
And all I could do was pray
Over the next few days
They had asked me my name
But when they searched through the system
They said I gave them a fake
My name was nowhere to be found
Therefor I did not exist
That's when the interrogations started
Something I tried to resist
Over the next several months
Scientists debated my case
As I was tortured for information
That if I had I would give in haste
They wondered if what I said could be true
Given all that I said had gone down
They did have the technology
But the machine had been powered down
There was talk of different dimensions
Special relativity and multiverse
If I changed something in the past
This would not be my universe
And that's when it hit me
I realized what I had done
I had killed my own grandfather
And I was his child's son
When they searched through the archives
Is when all the torture ceased
My grandad was murdered in 1956
Fifty years had passed at least
I had returned
To an alternate future
One without me involved
My life had not been sutured
They did not know what to do
To them my life meant nothing
But knowing they caused it all
Must have counted for something
They put me in a nice place
Give me anything that I need
But from the world I am secluded
A danger to the human breed
I would offset the balance
So secluded I am kept
Alone in this god damn house
Like my grandmother who wept
The loneliness kills me
And even though I am alive
I wish they had just killed me
Not allowed me to survive
Just because I'm alive
Dies not mean I exist
I am unknown to the world
Not even a damn statistic
Now everyday I must ask
Do I exist, or am I not
This is a problem they call
The grandfather paradox
-Carlos "House" Gerardo
